All about ME

I have to go through another two weeks before i get inked again.But i think it's worth the wait.

I cried yesterday. Because i was lonely. Because i felt i had no one, and i guess i don't. My guy has more shit of his own, and i guess he can't handle me anyways. I understood that yesterday. No one can understand why am i so unstable. No one will understand that why i am so wild and carefree at times. I do not wish to explain either.

From my phase of my 5 minute tongue piercing when i was thirteen, my purple/pink/red/copper hair phase to my first devil tattoo, i have come a long way. I have chugged beer just to prove that guys are not the only creature who can chug-a-lot-of-mugs. I have para-glided 5 times, got bored and bungee jumped 7 times.I have eaten bugs, abused drugs, cut myself and lost 110 pounds in the same bloody year.I have thrown money in the lake because well "it's just paper". I once begged a rikshaw-wala to give me a free ride to my home (i won the bet). I once gifted my past boyfriend cash on valentine's day (actually he asked for it). I was almost getting robbed in Jamaica station, New York, and i got an adrenaline kick out of it. I have paid someone 5 dollars, and have forgotten why i did that. I puked in my room on the first week of school. Thank god, my roommate was away, i had to clean my bed and had to mop the entire fucking floor at 3 am in the morning. I walked to downtown 4 times, for my second tattoo, waiting for Vincent to open up.

When i look back, i notice my pattern. My craziness is subsiding. It is almost lost. I still do have crazy kicks, and got my nose and ears(again) pierced because i was bored. Other than that i have sobered down a lot. I am focused about losing weight now, and getting my "goddess of power and lust" tattoo. That bitch is gonna hurt real bad though.

My span of focus is very short. I get bored easily, i start loving something as easily. I barely care about myself, and when i do then i LOVE me. I haven't figured who i am yet. I seem so strong and stubborn, but in the reality i don't know that if i even have a mind of my own.